Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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