For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
