i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize
