I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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