normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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