Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
