Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Randomize
