Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
So squirting runs in the family.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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