so that wasnt chicken after all
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Randomize
