The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I licked your asshole in confidence.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
