talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
