let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
