you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Randomize
