mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
