he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I understand Curling. That high.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
