Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
You took a bar mat shot.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
he just fucked me for my cheese..
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
