Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
he just fucked me for my cheese..
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
