I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
pray to the hookup gods
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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