I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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