I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
