O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
