just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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