He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
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