ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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