R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize