i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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