I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize