Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
