I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Best friends brother. Beat that.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
