the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
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