Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I just want to make out with him forever
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
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