You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
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