Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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