I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
PS: I just woke up from my shower
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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