I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
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