Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Randomize
