My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
