Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
