i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
