You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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