i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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