Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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