and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
