You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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