I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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