people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
