All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
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