smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
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