I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
