Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
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